Geneva, Switzerland, Friday 25th July, 1997
To surprise and widespread exclamation, CERN Restaurant 1 embarked, at around midday today, on a new journey of discovery and adventure as it served a meal not unlike the dish of "Fish and Chips", known as a delicacy in certain parts of Northern Europe. The introduction of this meal marks a turning point in CERN food provision, embracing a wider, more diverse cultural influence in food preparation.
However, industry analyst and regular Byte contributor Buzz N. Thusiastic claims that the introduction of the dish, from Q3 1997, revolutionises the world of catering at top scientific establishments, and profoundly affects medium to large-scale enterprise-level computing. "This is an amazing development," he claimed, "and I have to say that CERN is now in a win-win situation with regard to industry compliance, intranet development, and Java-class application integration. This will surely change the eating habits of all major industry players."
However, cynics stated that the introduction was disappointing in a number of respects, given that the "chips" were only slightly similar to the traditional offering, and the "fish" not subject to the typical preparation methods of the well-known delicacy. Mr Thusiastic remains buoyant in his optimism: "I believe that from Q4 1997, or maybe Q1 1998, the catering services will have moved on to a closer, more genuine article, and when this happens I expect much excitement and acclaim from the more established industry players."
"Restaurant 1", "Restaurant Java" and "Eat Once, Run Somewhere" are not trademarks of Sun Microsystems.